Your Thought Is Really Important to Me

Your Thought is Really Important to Me

Common statements in our cultural conditioning today are deeply imbedded beneath our language, possessing an almost seeming code that begs from the speaker only two questions: “Please” and “Thank you.” A yell or a scream or an insult is the inevitable part of the process of being human. Don’t you ever wonder about loss, or about feeling bad, low on the dial, on the level, proud and refreshed, clear, or guilty? Welcome to the social animal of humanity.

Following the points I’ve been making concerning the importance of communicating during hardship, there is this seminal breakdown to the approach to Nonviolent Communication designed for a way for us to open up to those we find difficult to resolve problems with. These are a few bullet points designed to show you the feelings and needs behind the words people say.

Down below are communicative statements that are attuned to Empathic Communication. They are reframes, if you will, of the truth behind only wanting, needing and connecting in Love and Cooperation.

Empathic Communication Attunement: What Would Loving Thoughts Sound Like?

• “Your thought is really important to me….” I CARE.
• “I rather be more honest here, but I feel her point is important for her to share first.”  I RESPECT. I HAVE COMPASSION.
• “I believe you are important, and I know what you have to say is believable.” I AM OPEN TO TRUTH. I DESIRE OPENNESS and CONNECTEDNESS. I WANT RESOLUTION. I VALUE BEING ON COMMON GROUND.
• “I feel better about myself today, so I will approach listening to people with an open curiosity.” I AM OPEN, OPTIMISTIC, and WANT TO CONTRIBUTE.
• ” Even though I do not agree with his statements on leadership in this situation, I strive for a way to survive this conversational lesson.” I LOVE TO LEARN AND GROW AND EXPAND. I AM CLEAR ON EFFECTIVENESS—IT GOES AGAINST MY AIM FOR HARMONY TO BEAR HOSTILITY.
• “I would like to pause and perceive her facial expressions while she fills her need to fill in the details.” I AM PATIENT. I MAKE AN EFFORT FOR HER TO PROCESS. I NOTICE BEAUTY. HER ARRIVAL TO CLARITY BENEFITS MINE TOO. I VALUE THE EFFORT FOR COOPERATION TO HAPPEN.
• “I don’t know what his point is, so I am going to ask him a few questions and listen so he has a safe space for clarification.”  I CONTRIBUTE and I OFFER LOVE. I HOLD SPACE AND OFFER SAFETY. MY GENEROSITY COMPLETES MY NEED FOR SELFLOVE. I AM ENHANCED BY PARTICIPATION AND ACTIVE LISTENING.

Let’s tell the Truth. It is not always easy to be patient while listening to a diverse group with challenging opinions. We may jump to fix, or stifle each other unintentionally, shifting uncomfortably with the thwarted opportunity to be heard. Premeditation and paused responses is a practice and benefits greatly the outcome of interactive growth between people. Instead of feeling limited by the idea of compromise, translating language into understanding can lead to a better chance of achieving win-win solutions. Empathy is Intentional and is Gentleness, setting the tone for quiet listening and a fresh way to exist peacefully.

“I thought distrust would make you hurt. I only took the Heart out of life and only for this burned.”